I Wanna Hold 'Em Like They Do In Texas Please

The thing about wrath is you have to know your buttons and who has got their grimy mitts on them. For instance, I hate driving in L.A. because I hit people. I do not mean I hit them in their cars. I mean I hit their bodies with the car I happen to be driving. This is not my fault. The residents of Los Angeles plod across streets and around corners like they are (again) either looking for addresses or waiting to be touched by actual angels. You can blame the Pedestrian Right of Way Law in California. These fucking idiots just trot out into the middle of the god-damn street, so they are begging to be weeded out of the fucking gene pool. Because of this, I have officially hit forty-seven people in almost as many cars. Don't worry, I will not be arrested because as a rule I wear a fake moustache when I drive anywhere, in any city.